Instead of blaming international firms for causing climate differences, deforestation and not being environmental-friendly, protesters should attempt to promote international long term growth, pollution and
environmental controls. Many factors contribute to these problems such as
globalisation and consumerism. Today, communication improvements not only allow
protesters to transmit environmental news quickly across all borders but become
a platform to present their ideas worldwide. Ironically, this platform protesters are
using is a result of globalisation.
The concern of globalisation causing environment problems is
not valid unless it meant magnified world trade or the misuse of foreign production
sites of international firms in countries with little execution of environmental legislation. It has been discovered that the latter might not be true as
transnational companies tend to be more environmentally-friendly over local
companies and are inclined to invest because of large markets. Studies have also
shown that about a fifth of the total world carbon emission is a result of
deforestation for agricultural and trade purposes.
Some comment that globalisation does not merely expedite but
becomes a passage for other factors to greater scale of forest clearing. With
globalisation comes higher consumption, in turn more clearing of forests are
done. National and international leaders have not successfully encouraged
environmental protection. Millions of acres of land have been cleared to meet the world's
food demand. Prime producers of the world like China have a growing demand for resources
from countries like Brazil to meet the multiplying global food demand. The problems here
arise as increasing number of forests are cleared and that land and water pollutions are incurred
worldwide to provide this. Burning of energy in China has polluted other parts of the
globe too.
With recent improvements in
communication media, the world has became a more interconnected place as
information can be disseminated efficiently worldwide. This increases the world
awareness of matters concerning environment. The world knows that global warming could possibly dwindle
world economy and lead social and monetary destruction equivalent to the World
Wars and Great Depression. On top of that, many has became victims of floods
due to increased temperatures. Evidently there exist a correlation between
non-environmental economic growth, heightened trade and industrialisation.
Furthermore, greater pollution is the consequence of increased trade and
consumerism. Not only does this include
land and water pollution but also air that can potentially lead to acid rain
elsewhere in the globe. It is appalling how the advanced technologies are not
able to be a tool of aid to overcome these problems in such situations. Worst, in spite of the probable chance of preventing the problems
with world effort, there seem to be no urgency to tackle the increasing
temperatures. Enforcement by nations that signed the Kyoto Protocol is not
persistent and USA, topping the greenhouse gases emitter list, declined sign
the protocol too.
Affiliation between countries is so extensive now that standing
solitary can cause a massive problem associated to the world's health in the long-run. UN demonstrates an
incapability to confront the world's troubles. Nonetheless, the world's key leaders' impotency and unwillingness to lead UN is essentially the essence of
the problem. Had it been otherwise, the consequences of globalisation could be
avoided.
A well written but it's far too long as you've written c550 words so please edit it.
ReplyDeleteInstead of blaming international firms for causing climate differences, deforestation and not being environmental(Word form)-friendly, protesters should attempt to promote international long term growth, (^)pollution and environmental controls. Many factors contribute to these problems such as globalisation and consumerism. Today, communication improvements not only allow protesters to transmit environmental news quickly across all borders but become a platform to present their ideas worldwide. Ironically, this platform protesters are using is a result of globalisation.
(A very long introductory paragraph which needs reorganising)
The concern of globalisation causing environment problems is not valid unless it meant(Tense)...
//Some comment that globalisation does not merely expedite but becomes a passage for other factors to greater scale of forest clearing.(rephrase)// With globalisation comes higher consumption, in turn more clearing of forests are(Verb form) done(Wrong word). //National and international leaders have not successfully encouraged environmental protection. Millions of acres of land have been cleared to meet the world's food demand. Prime producers of the world like China have a growing demand for resources from countries like Brazil to meet the multiplying global food demand. The problems here arise as (^) increasing number of forests are cleared and that land and water pollutions(Word form) are(Verb form) incurred worldwide to provide this. Burning of energy in China has polluted other parts of the globe too. (Here you have numerous unlinked sentences. Merge some and use linking words to increase its coherency)//)
...This increases the world awareness of matters concerning environment. The world knows that global warming could possibly //dwindle world economy(rephrase)\\ and lead (^) social and monetary destruction equivalent to the World Wars and Great Depression. On top of that, many has(Verb form) became victims of floods due to increased temperatures. Evidently there exist(Verb form) a correlation between non-environmental economic growth, heightened trade and industrialisation.
Furthermore, greater pollution is the consequence of increased trade and consumerism. Not only does this include land and water pollution but also air (^) that can potentially lead to acid rain elsewhere in the globe. It is appalling how the advanced technologies are not able to be a tool of aid to overcome these problems in such situations. /Worst, in spite of the probable chance of preventing the problems with world effort, (rephrase)/there seem to be no urgency to tackle the increasing temperatures. Enforcement by nations that signed the Kyoto Protocol is not persistent and USA, topping the greenhouse gases emitter list, declined (^)sign the protocol too.
Affiliation between countries is so extensive now that /standing solitary(rephrase)/ can cause a massive problem associated to the world's(Wrong word) health in the long-run. (^)UN demonstrates an incapability to confront the world's troubles. Nonetheless, the world's key leaders' impotency and unwillingness to lead UN is essentially the essence of the problem. Had it been otherwise, the consequences of globalisation could be avoided.